How to Cultivate a Network of Endless Referrals, Part II (The One Key Question”)

Bob Burg

In the previous article we established the Golden Rule of Business Networking as, "all things being equal, people will do business with, and refer business to, those people they know, like and trust."

And, because most people know about 250 other people, every time you develop these feelings toward you in another person (whether they are a potential prospect or simply a referral source) you've just increased your own reach by a potential 250 people every single time.

To begin the process, it was suggested you ask, what I call, Feel-Good Questions®. Non-salesly, they are simply designed to instantaneously begin the rapport-building process.

Two Feel-Good Questions® are "How did you get started in the widget business?" and "What do you enjoy most about what you do?"

But now it's time to ask, what I call, "The One Key Question" that will set you apart from everyone else:

"Gary, how can I know if someone I speaking with would be a good prospect for you?" 

Why is this question so powerful? First, just by asking it you've separated yourself from everyone else. It's the first indication that you are someone special. You are probably the only person he has ever met who asked him this question during the first conversation (or, perhaps any conversation).

You have also just implied that you are concerned with his welfare and wish to contribute to his success. Most people would already be trying to sell their own product or service, but not you.

You can be sure your new prospect/future referral source will have an answer. Let's say Gary sells copying machines. After thinking about it for a moment (after all, he's surprised by the very question), he suggests the next time you walk by a copying machine and notice that the accompanying wastepaper basket is overflowing with tons of crumpled-up pieces of paper, that's a good sign the copying machine has been breaking down a lot. He says, "That's a good prospect for me."

People you meet from now on will be glad - delighted - to answer that question. Will they appreciate your sincere interest? You bet they will!

Again, that question will be the first indication that you are somebody special and different-a person worthy of getting to know better.

In the many years since I've been teaching that question, I've been contacted by many who've told me that one question has transformed their business lives. They've seen the look of disbelief in their new friend's eyes, astounded that they've been asked such a question. And, from there, a very profitable relationship has begun.

I see two reasons: One, you've given to this person the feeling and knowledge that just by associating with you, their success is going to increase. That, right there, makes you more "attractive" to that person, who then feels a vested personal interest in cultivating an association with you, which includes giving back to you.

Secondly, though, and more importantly is that it causes you to think of ways you can help others, thus taking the focus off of yourself. As Stuart Wilde wrote in his book, The Trick To Money Is Having Some "The secret to success is to subjugate your ego and serve others." I also enjoy what Thomas Power, author of Networking For Life refers to as, "The willing suspension of self-interest." Not the foregoing of it; just the temporary suspension.

Remember, "In a free-enterprise based economy, the amount of money you make is directly proportional to the number of people you serve." Often, before you serve them - or their referrals - directly through your products or services, you'll serve them through other sources, such as the referrals you give to them.

Yes, "the One Key Question" will serve you profitably throughout your life and career.

By the way, if you are speaking with someone who is not directly in sales, that's fine, too. Simply gear your questions for that person and their unique situation. You can always ask about their family, hobbies, or causes in which they are involved.

So your conversation has ended and you never even brought up your business.  Good, since your relationship with this new prospect may not be far enough along for him to be receptive to it That's fine. Hopefully, you've obtained his business card.  If asked for yours, provide it, but don't think too much about it. So long as you have their card, you are in the position to follow up correctly and systematically. Follow-up is another very misunderstood part of Networking which is actually very simple once the core principle is embraced. (We'll cover that in part 4.)

Great job. This first conversation is just the initial step in cultivating a referral relationship with this person and many others. In the next article, we'll continue the process.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bob Burg (http://www.burg.com/) is author of the sales classic, Endless Referrals: Network Your Everyday Contacts into Sales.  His newest book (coauthored with John David Mann) is The Go-Giver: A Little Story About A Powerful Business Idea, which hit #6 on The Wall Street Journal Business Bestsellers list after just three weeks. To download a free Chapter of The Go-Giver, visit http://www.thegogiver.com/.